The church saga Part II

everything else. I felt strangely serene afterward. He was gentle and beautiful and I felt like anything could happen in life, that at least one of my dreams came true. I had been fully in love with him since Sept, 1989, and here it was March, 1990. He was very reserved with his feelings, he rarely took risks. He was an emotional stuffer all the way. I want to mention I was married and I take full responsibility for falling in love with someone else. By the time, the physical connection took place it was too late. I couldn't have resisted unless a bus ran me over that day. I loved him. He told me to keep it under my hat. A few weeks later,th I went to his house in the middle of the day and told him I wanted to be with him. He must have been blind not to see how much I loved him. He must have thought about it for some time before inviting me over. He told me point blank that is not what he wanted in life at that time. (I didn't know if it was to be with a woman, or to slow down his acting career- his production company ended up doing a successful play in an open stage in a restaurant in Hollywood). Anyways, I did tell the Pastor becuz I felt guilty and I also told Sandra, a girl in the church he was dating. My Pastor was cool with it but Sandra was not. I don't think my Pastor was happy with Larry being involved with so many women in the church. (At least three in one year). Sandra flipped out for she was really naievely in love with him. The whole thing eventually blew over and I let it go. I had a baby with my then husband and still talked to LW on and off for ten years. However, it took me at least four years to get over him and it almost ruined my marriage. I still don't know why he wanted to be with me except curiosity as he stated that night. He left the church about six months after I moved back to Wisconsin. He ended up dissing his best friend Steve and another woman he dated named Nancy. To this day, I don't think I have ever loved anyone so deeply except the father of my first miscarriage, James from Virginia.